S3 Ep. 190 The Morality of Selfishness: Balancing Self-Interest and Community Well-Being

Speaker 1: Hello there, welcome to the World Cafe podcast. This podcast has been designed with created content that centers on the power of words. Can we really do anything without speaking? Can we really do anything without the agency of words? Yes, that is what this podcast is all about, and I am your host , amakri Isubuye, your neighborhood word trader. I believe in the power of words , for it is the unit of creation . I trade in words to profit my world. Oh, good morning, good afternoon , good evening, good, everything . Wherever you are on the surface of the earth listening to me, wherever you are on the surface of the earth listening to me, always an awesome, awesome time. Each time I come into the space yes, you know how we say it. This is the space where we come in to lean on one another's experience, to forge a positive path. It's been an amazing year, I must say, eventful. Yes, we still have some time, as it were. Come to ask yourself as if we're going to run out of time. Well, the year has been eventful, from one thing to the other, and the other and the other and the other, so many every day unfolding and, by His grace, we are here. I'm, yes, reaching you from the city of Abuja. Here in Nigeria, it's been raining. I told you a while ago the rains are back and all of that it's been raining, so the atmosphere is somewhat cool, as in temperature-wise, but in terms of activity, ah, ah, it is picking up. Yes, it is like rooftop high. So how are you, how you doing? I need to ask that question because it means a lot to me each time I sit behind this microphone and know that you were there listening. It gives me this joy, you know, and all of that, and I'm here, yes, to share with you an amazing time. All right, so what are we going to be doing today? A lot, yes, if you've been following me, a lot has been, you know, unfolding, which I have the opportunity to share with you and, you know, on the show, get you to like, think, and all of that. I want to say a very big thank you to all of you. Recently, we hit that mark at 10,000 downloads on the World Cafe podcast so exciting. And when I saw it, it gave me this calm feeling to like wow, people are listening, yes, and you are sharing, you are helping , you are adding to the narrative, the positive narrative, and all of that, and I'm grateful to all of you, all of you, you know it's been three years. Yes, doing this, sitting down, sharing, bringing people on the show, discussing, and all of that, and I'm grateful. Thank you for listening. Thank you'm grateful. Thank you for listening, thank you for downloading, thank you for sharing. Like, my children will say that this podcast will go higher and higher. Like you know, reach out to people out there. Yes, my family is involved in what I do. Yes, within this space, they are very much involved and I'm grateful to God about that. Okay, so what are we going to be doing today? I've had this on my mind for a while. I even did a write-up about it which I'm going to share. Yes, on the show Today we're going to be looking at the morality of selfishness. You have that, the morality of selfishness. But before I go into that, you know, in course of my what I call it musings, sitting down to think and, you know, talk to myself, right and all that I came across this Nike advert. It was so engaging. It has thrown up so much what I say discussions out there, and some are good, some are not good All the same, but when I saw it , it fell into, should I say the frame of my thought today the morality of selfishness. I think that advert was voiced by Willem Dafoe, the guy that I mean, one of Hollywood's great. Let me see if you can pinpoint one of his movies. Sorry, spider-man yes, if you watch Spider-Man the glider yes, he played that part himself and his son, yes. So I'm going to read it. I will try to like see if I can get that energy with which he delivered it and we'll start a discussion from there and we go into all the stuff. Am I a bad person, tell me? Am I? I am single-minded? There's a nike advert, although , so I'm going to start from the beginning. I think it was. They did this in preparation for the summer olympics which is taking, which is kickstart, and , uh, in august, and all of that . Am I a bad person, tell me? Am I? I am single-minded, I am deceptive, I am obsessive, I am selfish. Does that make me a bad person? Am I a bad person? Am I? I have no empathy, I don't respect you, I am never satisfied, I have an obsession with power, I am irrational, I have zero remorse, I have no sense of compassion. I am delusional. I am a narco. You think I am a bad person? Tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me, am I? I think I'm better than everyone else. I want to make what's yours. Sorry, I want to take what's yours. I'll never give it back. What's mine is mine and what's yours is mine. Am I a bad person? Tell me? Am I? Does that make me a bad person? Tell me, am I? Does that make me a bad person? Okay, so when I saw this, I was like okay, somehow we have some people who are flowing in the same frequency in terms of reasoning and bringing out this content and this advert has, uh, gotten some people really, you know, I would say, rattled, as we say it in nigeria, table shaking and breaking and all of that. But I I like you to listen to me because today's conversation I will do more of reading than pick out one or two things as we read, because I did write my thoughts down here, which I have shared, published it in one or two platforms the morality of selfishness in human relationships. I call it a Twainian perspective . Imagine a group photograph, a moment frozen in time, capturing a spectrum of emotions, personalities and relationships. When we first receive this photograph, what is the initial impulse? Each person, almost without fail, seeks out their own face before examining the expressions of others. This instinctive act is a subtle statement to the human tendency towards selfishness. But is this selfishness inherently immoral, or could it possess a morality of its own? So I shared in one of the trainings I'll keep reading and interject here and there. In one of the trainings I was opportune to take, as in, I did share something like this and surprisingly, everybody answered in the affirmative I will look out for my face before any other . Mark Twain, with his characteristic blend of humor and insight, once remarked the human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. He understood the complexities and contradictions of human nature. In this light, let us explore the notion that our initial self-focus in a group photo may not be a sign of moral failing, but rather an initial aspect of our social fabric Self-awareness as a foundation for empathy. When we look for our own face first, we engage in an act of self-awareness. This self-awareness is not merely narcissism. It is the starting point of empathy. By understanding our own emotions and reactions in the photograph, we are better equipped to relate to the feelings of others. Twain, a keen observer of human behavior, might suggest that recognizing our own humanity is a prerequisite to appreciating the humanity in others. The mirror of selfishness reflects common humanity. That's point two. What I said earlier was point one. Twain often highlighted the shared qualities and virtues of people In the group photograph. Each person's selfish glance at their own face is a universal act. This shared behavior creates a bond of commonality. It reminds us that everyone seeks validation. Everyone desires to be seen and acknowledged. In Twain's word, there is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable. This desire is to see ourselves first, though seemingly selfish , is a forbidden charm that underscores our universal need for recognition. Balancing self-interest with altruism. Mctwin understood the balance of self-interest and altruism in the broader context of human relationships. This balance is crucial of human relationships. This balance is crucial. Selfishness in moderate doses ensures self-preservation and personal well-being. However, unchecked selfishness can lead to isolation and conflict. Twain's humor often poked fun at the extremes, encouraging a needle path. As he famously quipped, the best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. Thus, after finding our own face in the group photograph, we are naturally drawn to examine the expressions of others, seeking connections and shared joy. The ethical dimension of self-interest. From Twain's perspective, morality is not a rigid set of rules but a dynamic interplay of intentions and actions. The initial act of selfishness is seeking our own face. The initial act of selfishness is seeking our own face Can have ethical dimensions. That's, in seeking our own face Can have ethical dimensions. If it leads to self-improvement , self-acceptance and, ultimately, greater empathy towards others, then it serves as a moral purpose. As Twain might just do the right thing, it will gratify some people and astonish the rest. By understanding ourselves, we'll become more capable of doing the right thing for others . The role of humor in human relationships this is point number five. This is point number five. Finally, twain's humor serves as a vital tool in navigating the complexities of selfishness and morality. Humor allows us to reflect on our own imperfections without harsh judgment. It encourages us to laugh at our own selfish impulses while recognizing their role in our social interactions. Twain's playful yet profound insights remind us that while selfishness is a natural part of being human, it is also a stepping stone to deeper connections and moral growth. In conclusion, the morality of selfishness as viewed through the lens of a group of photographs is a nuanced concept . It reveals that our initial focus on ourselves is not purely self-serving but a gateway to empathy, common humanity and balanced relationships. Mctwin's wit and wisdom illuminate this journey, showing us that in our selfishness lies a potential for greater understanding and ethical living . So next time you find yourself in a group photograph, remember Twain's timeless advice Look for your face, laugh a little, laugh a little and then cherish the faces around you. I take that again. So next time you find yourself in a group photo, remember Twain's timeless advice Look for your face, laugh a little and then cherry faces around you. So you know, when I did this write-up and somehow shared it in some groups, because a lot has been happening within my space, as in where I live presently in nigeria, bujja to be precise a lot of tensions, emotions, you know. You look at it from the political side, the religious, look at it from ethnic, whatever . I was involved in a conversation about what is going on in my country in terms of the corrupt practices and what have you going on? How do we solve the problem? Somebody, you know, asked enthusiastically that we've been talking, we've been talking, how do we solve the problem? And I brought the morality of selfishness into the conversation and everybody went quiet. Because the truth is, we all are looking for ourselves and from what we just read, you come to see that in looking for yourself , you find others. That is the truth, the fundamental truth in all of this in looking for yourself, you find others. Just as the scripture says love your neighbor as you love yourself. Love, you can only understand it when you love yourself. So in trying to do what we call self-care and all of that, not to the extreme, but looking at it, from what we just read, you come to see the truth revealed. You know there is this thing. Before I came on to record, I was just like okay, playing with my thoughts around this subject matter and all of that. And you know, a lot of us are driven by what I call it the corruption of success. We just want to be successful at any cost in quote, any cost in quote. So we pursue success in such a way that we don't care, we use that principle and justify in the means. But ask yourself is that true? Is that correct? Does the end really justify the means? Does it? You know, I put myself in the conversation not as if I am outside the globe. No, I am in the globe. I'm here, I live, I breathe on the earth, you understand. But the morality of selfishness. When you look at yourself, is it good for you? If it is, then it's good for your brother. Selfishness when you look at yourself is it good for you? If it is, then it's good for your brother, it's good for your sister, it's good for your friend, it's good for your neighbor. If we have that what I say approach, so many things in my opinion would be solved, even in a corporate setting, in an organization. You see, people desire us to climb the corporate ladder. They want to do anything and everything just to get to that tippy top. But look at it from the frame of the morality of selfishness. Do you think that is the right thing? Just like Willem Dafoe asked that question in the Nike of. Am I a bad person? You know, in sports, in competition, we see it play out. You know competitive sports and athletes and all that. You see the selfishness. Like in the game of football, where you have 11, 11, as it were, 22 people run on the on the pitch, there's only one. There's always one person who, as we call it, the goal scorer. You know, he, he, he, he finishes all the play and like, like you now have names in the game, like Sierra 7, you know, and all of that In the recent times, that is now Ronaldo and all of the greats that you come to see. Imagine if you just kept them in the field, all by themselves, to kick that leather around leather. Nothing comes up, but in the multitude, in the midst of the players, and all that. You come to see their dexterity . You come to see their, their uniqueness. You come to see their energy. You come to see their energy. You come to see their name. It come out and all of a sudden we're just like whoo. That guy is fantastic, he's great. Does that make them a bad person ? It's a question, it's a food for thought. Yep, in a race, does that make you a bad person? You're symbol. He wants to be the world's greatest. He wants to. You know, does that make you a bad person? Okay, this is what I came to do today. Yeah, just to share with you the morality of selfishness In this season where there's a lot of what I call it anger in the atmosphere. A lot of people are angry. You have mental health issues. Yeah, ask yourself, just like the United States President, jfk . John F Kennedy said that favorite campaign quote do not think of what America can do for you, but what you can do for America morality of selfishness. So, when you go out there this week, when you go out there this season, when you go out there, remember if it's good for you, it's good for your brother, but you must find yourself in your brother and live. All right, guys, thank you for being there, thank you for listening, thank you for listening, thank you for sharing . It gives us so much joy, gives us so much, you know, happiness, knowing that you were there, listening. So this is what I came to do today. So go out there, yes, and live with the mind not just of selfishness, but of selflessness , discovering yourself in your brother, in your sister. All right, then, whatever you do, never you lose yourself. Find yourself Till I come your way again. Bye for now. Twitter, facebook, linkedin and Instagram all at Amakri Isoboye. Also, you can get copies of my books A Cocktail of Words, the Color of Words by H Aaron Notebook and Hawkers, focus on God on Amazon and Roving Heights online bookstores. You can also subscribe to my YouTube channel at the same address at Amakri Isowe. I'd love to hear from you and how this podcast has impacted you. You can leave me a message at my email address, amakrigaribaldi at gmailcom. That is A-M-A-C-H-R-E-E-E-G-A-R-I-B-A-L-D-I . Yes, till I come your way again . Bye for now.